Be Happy Anyway

Be Happy Anyway
From Brave Girls Club

Thursday, May 28, 2009

In Response to Octamom's "Me TiME"

I know my chaos is only 1/4 of my friend Octamom, but I was giggling as I read her post today, relating to just about everything she wrote about except the part about homeschooling.

When my husband went to the Philippines the first time (supposedly for 5 weeks) I thought "this won't be so bad." But as 5 weeks SLOWLY turned into 4 months, I thought I would lose my mind because we didn't ave a babysitter, and my mother and aunt were slowly losing patience with my son. Errands came down to the last minute decision of, "Is it worth dragging a hyper three year old along." Dance lessons and the like were non-negotiable, but trips to Target and the grocery store would begin with questions like, "How long can I really go with this last roll of toilet paper?" (a problem I know Octamom doesn't have) or "Can the kids survive on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for another couple of days?"

When Gary returned from his extended trip, I gave him a kiss, opened the gifts he brought me (a ton of Coach handbags,) and "disappeared" for two days, coming home to sleep and shower. One might ask, "What does one do for two days?" Mostly I did nothing and enjoyed every minute of it. I did escape to the Fountain of Beauty (yes that's its real name) and considered asking for every service they had. I wandered Target and drove to Austin and enjoyed walking up and down the aisles of all places - The Container Store. I called a couple of friends to join me but they had prior engagements, so I even did the unthinkable. I went out to eat at the Cheesecake Factory and ordered everything I ever wanted and was never able to enjoy because of antsy children. I stayed as long as I wanted and even considered not going home, but in the end my Buick LeSabre quietly wound its way through the countryside, finding its way back home.

Currently, I am going through the same situation. This time, however, I managed to find a babysitter who likes my son, and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel as Gary will be home in three days.

I know there are single moms out there who do what I have been doing everyday without fail, and there are moms who are "geographically single" who wake up every morning and faithfully support their husbands who are defending our country's freedom. I see these ladies everyday where I teach school. I am certain I could learn a lot from many of them. I am not them and I thank God everyday that I don't have to worry about whether my husband is not going to come home because of some IED.

This time when Gary gets home, he will still be greeted by a kiss. I will open my Mother's Day gifts and then I am going to call the Fountain of Beauty, but this time it will be for his Father's Day gift - thankful that his 5 week trip didn't turn into a 5 month trip. Then I am going to find my mother and take her out for her long awaited Mother's Day shopping trip sans children.

I'll be thinking of you as we enjoy the Cheesecake Factory. Oh and Octamom, you are more than welcome to meet us there.


Julie Tucker-Wolek said...

I feel your pain.....I was a single Mom for 8 years with Adam....and ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh did his ADHD almost KILL ME....He got kicked out of 7 daycares (which cost me vacation time at work and trying to find a new PLACE and BEG them to take him....LOL) he was suspended from KINDERGARTEN (who does that?!?!? LOL) and just has been a roller coaster ride with him.....but U many grays as he has given me....I wouldn't change a thing...LOL! :):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)

MJ said...

I am grateful that I am not a single parent. I have no idea how they are able to do anything. I would be completely lost without my spouse's support!

Enjoy the Cheesecake Factory!

BlessedinTexas said...

Single parenting is not without challenges but it does have some positives as well. I wouldn't trade the past 9 years either like Ms Smiley face said. I love being a mom and knew I was probably taking this responsibility on my own in all aspects. I am like you I live for moments for ME TIME but when I have it I am usually so needing to rest and just hang out that I dont get much accomplished but that is okay with me since I run ninety to nothing during the school year. summer is a much needed break for all of us! Thanks for writing today, I will be adding yours to my blogs that I follow if I ever figure out how to do it? I am a lil slow I guess even after taking the class, darn it! Have a wonderful afternoon and only 5 more days of school!! Woohooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Unknown said...

With just under 23 hours till Dave arrives home I am just thankful that it's only for a moment not forever. I just want to lie down and not get up for a week! I like the sound of the Cheesecake Factory!!
Hugs to you my friend :)

Roban said...


You seem to know how to recharge your inner being (outer one, too, with that Fountain of Beauty sidetrip!) And I would be right beside you in The Container Store (I love that place, and when I can't get to one, I take a leisurely stroll down the local aisles of the Targets and WalMarts to see the containers on their shelves, too.)

Glad to hear you'll have your husband back at home. I don't envy single moms at all, but I DO admire them tremendously.

When my husband is out of town, Hannah and I live off pasta or eat out. Tonight it was Ron and Chang's Country Kitchen... where home-style cooking meets Chinese!

miruspeg said...

I too 'take off my hat' to single fact all parents!
That is one of the reasons I have been looking after Joseph each Monday since he was born.

So happy for you that you have found a babysitter that likes your son and makes you feel comfortable to leave him for short periods of time.

This is a very upbeat post considering Gary's absence. Looks like you have found some BALANCE in your day to day life!

You have just inspired me to start a 'Gratitude Journal".

"Today I am grateful for all the wonderful people in my life who challenge me to think differently."


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